LIVE COACHING: Conquer Self-Doubt & Stay on Course with Your Calling

Hey Friend!

Do you suffer from self-doubt? Then this blog post is for you. I’m really thrilled to bring you a little snippet from what goes on behind the curtains of Podcast to Profit, my six-month group coaching mastermind that I do with podcasters. I help my students get more:

• Downloads
• Grow Their Show
• Get Visible
• Create Online Courses
• Create Coaching Offers
• Learn to Sell
• Learn to Scale, Etc.

One of the things I love so much about Podcast to Profit is every other Thursday, I sit with my students for ninety minutes and we pour into their incredible questions. Whether it be me auditing their homework, screen sharing, or going through tactical things like a description or a sales page audit, sometimes someone will bring up something that’s mindset or heart-related.

I truly believe these are the roots of so many of the issues that we think are the real problem. But in reality, it’s a limiting belief. Such as that thing that has been spoken over you or the thought that maybe you can’t do this or you’re not good enough.

Maybe it’s no one will listen to you or you can’t do it in the right way. Therefore, you won’t do it all. It’s all of these things that swirl, mix, and manifest and ultimately create a barrier to progress.

The Story of Self-Doubt Is Consistently the Same

Recently, one of our amazing students, Amber, asked a question specific to this about her mindset and about her self-doubt around the brand that she truly felt called to build. I believe this message is for every single entrepreneur or aspiring entrepreneur. Take this to heart, stew on it, pray on it, and allow Holy Spirit to work through this conversation that I had with this incredible student.

I pray this blesses you as much as the reminder blessed me because I face this stuff too. It doesn’t matter how far you’ve gone in your business or how successful you are or how many times you’ve tried and failed. The story is the same. It consistently gets hard even when it gets better. The hard part really never goes away. We learn to:

• Weather it in a different way.
• Mind our mindset.
• Have a kingdom perspective and an eternal focus instead of an immediate problem focus.

So, let’s dig in. I pray this is helpful for you. Let me know if you have a question like this over at my website. You can leave me a recording with your question. I would love to answer it live on my show.

Free Podcasting Workshop

Real quick, before we get into this coaching session, did you know that I have a free workshop for you? This 40-minute workshop is going to show you visually why podcasting is my absolute favorite way to grow an online business. It’s the number one way that we make money here at Stef Gass.

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Address the First Problem of Self-Doubt

Below is my conversation with Podcast to Profit student, Amber.

Stef: Alright, Amber. So I see we have a lot of things going on in the question box. I think when you guys pose a bunch of tactical questions and then you wrap it all in, really you’re having a heart and mind problem right now. We can’t attack any of the tacticals until we address the first problem, okay? So let’s start there.

You said you’re feeling some self-doubt. You’re struggling with this perfectionism. You’re second-guessing everything that you’ve created, your title, your TSO, everything. Second-guessing is normal, but we have to push past that because of so many things. Let me hear from you for a minute because this is for everybody. Tell me a little bit about what’s going on Amber.

Amber: So I’m better I would say. Yesterday and the day before, I was at, like, a two. And I went back to your very first module and just printed out the decision-making paper and had a CEO God meeting. That’s where I needed to go first. I feel like God has put me on this podcast for a reason.

But I have so much doubt about my wording and my messaging. Am I smart enough? Do I speak well enough? That comes in every time I go to press record. Or I look at my podcast title and I got feedback like, “Is your Mom really feeling burnt out? Is she really looking up self-care?” The person was very well-meaning but they just sent me for a spiral. That shouldn’t have sent me into a spiral. Do you know what I mean?

You Aren’t the Only Person to Feel This Way

Stef: This is so funny that you bring this up because I just had another conversation with somebody this morning. One of my dear friends, somebody who is very soon to be a seven-figure business owner, has the exact same fears.

The thing that I want everybody to understand is that we all have limiting beliefs about ourselves. Every single one of us. So Amber said one of hers is thinking:

• Am I well-versed enough?
• Am I coming up with the right language?
• Is my copy good?
• Am I delivering correctly?

That’s normal. One of my weaknesses is either being too competitive or being judgmental. I know that about myself. It’s fine. That’s just some of the things that I deal with. So my limiting belief will come in and say, oh, that’s because you’re this way.

The Enemy Looks for Cracks in Your Armor

Stef: The enemy wants to label us in things that make us human. Because we have a thing that makes us human, that is not defining who we are. It just means it’s something that we have to consistently surrender at the feet of Jesus. Every. Single. Day.

It’s the one place where the enemy looks for a crack in your armor and he comes in and he feeds on it. In the conversation I had with my friend this morning, I told her, “The second you crack open the armor and allow the limiting belief to become something you’re wearing, your armor is cracked. There’s a hole. There’s an opening.” She said, “I don’t understand what else to do to armor up.”

• I pray.
• I’m in scripture.
• I’m doing things

And I’m like, those are outward, which is great. But what about the inward part of you allowing the hole in your mind to become a place where the enemy comes in and feeds?

So the only reason I bring this up is we all have a thing that we allow to become an identity at certain points. For some of us, it’s sometimes in the year, it’s sometimes in the month, and it’s sometimes daily. Do you guys know what I’m talking about? Is there a thing, a negative thing that you either say about yourself? Whether true or not, you struggle with? Welcome to being human and being normal!

Be Willing to See That Piece of Self-Doubt

Stef: We have to be willing to see that piece. I’m going to see that I am believing I am not qualified to speak on this podcast. This is a belief that I have. It’s okay to say that out loud Amber like you did.

But what I want to applaud you for is the fact that you knew where to go. You went back to the training, Module One, on purpose, right? This is a serious hurdle that you’re going to face. And every time you’re more successful, you will have even more of this. This doesn’t go away. We live here in this fallen place. Welcome to warfare!

So Amber said, “You know what? I’m going to take this captive and I’m going to bring it to God. I’m going to follow this training and I’m going to sit and have a business meeting.” And she went from a two to a five. I think that’s absolutely incredible that you took control of your mind. and you took control and you went and surrendered it to God.

That’s the very first thing we all have to do, okay? But now, so we did that. That’s great. But in order to move from this place of, like, I’m going to have to battle this thing all the time. I think we have to get to the root of this belief that we have.

What Is the Root of Self-Doubt?

Stef: So it’s not about you not being called to self-care. I think that’s really clear. She does say self-care. I think the more blatant and clear that you make this, which we’ve done together, that’s all you can do. We can guess, get stuck and spiral on perfecting a TSO. We have a lot of that today.

I’m trying not to get on a soapbox on the fact that we cannot get stuck and spiral into making something perfect. Because that is not even possible. It’s not possible for a TSO to be perfect. You’re not even available for it. What you’re available for is, I’m going to get close, and I’m going to move on and I’m here for that.

The other piece, and then I’m going to let you talk, is when we sit in a place of self-doubt and perfectionism, you know? There’s a difference between curiosity for the Kingdom of God and fear of man. Curiosity in alignment with the Kingdom of God, is good, healthy, and great.

We all go into a place of spiral, worry, control, and obsession of trying to make sure it’s right. We’ve moved the needle back over to fear of man.

Because here’s the truth, everyone. If you’re curious for the Kingdom of God and you make a mistake, do you think God will help you fix it whether or not you’re looking for that answer? Are we in control of everything and making every single thing perfect and right? That’s the enemy’s lie over your life.

• Be perfect.
• Make it right.
• Somebody else said you should change it.

The enemy doesn’t want you to move forward. He wants you stuck in the thinking and the spiral and the worry and the control.

Take the Next Step

Stef: But God says, take the next step. If we look at scripture it says, “Don’t worry about tomorrow, because tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own,” Matthew 6:34. So, what’s up for today? Today, Amber has self-care for new moms, and it’s freaking amazing. Amber is doing the best that she can. She’s showing up and she’s speaking out about this topic that’s on her heart for the glory of God. Not for somebody who may say I don’t like that topic. Okay, it’s not for you. Love you, bye-bye. That’s okay. We’re not for everybody.

So that was a message for everybody because I really needed to have this talk with you guys today because I see a lot of this throughout the questions. I hope that resonates with everybody.

As far as a tactical here, we see what’s happening. We’re okay with it. What are we facing? I’m facing:

• Ego
• Control
• Frustration
• Impostor Syndrome
• Comparison
• Limiting Belief That I’m Qualified

What’s the thing for you? It’s okay. What is it? Take it to God, have the meeting, and surrender it. Lord, I’m sorry I’ve fallen into that. Help me get rid of it. I’m not here for it anymore. I want to be unavailable for this. Please help me.

Step Forward Every, Single, Day.

Stef: God will help you. And then what we do is we get into this mindset, and we do the work, and we renew our mind, and we actively step forward every single day even though it’s not perfect.

Anybody who is stopping the moving process because it’s not perfect, that’s the enemy who would rather put up a barrier right in front of your face. You’re allowing that to be there. Let’s be unavailable for that. Are you guys with me? Are we good? Okay, Amber, tell me your thoughts and feelings and anything that came up for you there.

Amber: I appreciate the fact that we’ve already gone through the title and the TSO together. So just allow that to be and take the next step. And then in the part of what actually matters, I put down your difference between curiosity for the Kingdom and fear of man. I’ve been obsessing, and I’ve been allowing that to be a wall.

Make the Decision to Get Out of the Trap

Stef: So good. And that’s okay. We all do it. I do it on a daily basis when I’m like, oh, for the love, Lord. Lord, where are you? But that’s the beauty. It’s like getting into this posture, Amber, that you just did. Well, I fell into this little trap for a hot second. I’m going to get right out.

The thing we have to understand is the decision to stay trapped. So make the decision to get out of the trap right away. You’re going to fall into it. Some of us fall into it daily. I’m going to get out, I’m going to get out, I’m going to get out, right? You just did. You’re going to wake up tomorrow and be freaking epic. And if God wants you to make a pivot or a shift or a change, I promise you, it will be very clear.

I pray this blesses you!

Xo,

Stef

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